When we think the world can’t get any madder a Government Minister surprises us with a new insane policy.
Education Secretary & Equalities Minister, Justine Greening MP has confirmed proposals for a Gender Recognition Bill that will allow people to choose their gender identity, and alter their birth certificate accordingly, just as they wish.
First of all, let me say that I am well aware there is a tiny minority of people who are born with physical abnormalities which affect their gender, and that they may have serious physical and psychological problems; and that some people have ‘gender dysphoria’, which is a general dissatisfaction with the gender they were born with.
I have the greatest sympathy for people with real physical and psychological problems. And they deserve whatever help is available to them.
However, the proposed new policy that will allow people to ‘choose their gender’ is pure insanity. We are being told that the law will force us to accept something irrespective of objective reality.
We are being told that Parliament can pass a law that will make a lie the truth, and the truth a lie. And no doubt there will be legal penalties for anyone who speaks the truth in defiance of the law.
My problem is not with people who want to assume the appearance of the opposite sex, but rather that the rest of us have to accept something as true which is obviously not true.
A man dressed as a woman is not a woman. A woman dressed as a man is not a man. A man, or woman, dressed as Napoleon does not become Napoleon.
A person may believe they are Napoleon, and when we meet them, out of consideration we may address them with, ‘Bonjour Monsieur L’Emperor’, but the law will not recognise them as Napoleon (as least not yet, but who knows?).
That may be very sad, or tragic, for those who want to be something they are not – but life is often sad and tragic.
One insanity usually leads to another. So how could the sane take advantage of this proposed new law?
Viz Magazine has a ‘Top Tips’ section, and I wondered how they might cover this story? Maybe like this:
- Men get your pension early
The state pension age for women was payable at 60 as opposed to 65 for men. This is now being brought into alignment, but there is still some benefit to be had. Men can identify as women and get their pension early. If men change their gender to female in 2018 they can draw their pension at 64 years and six months. Half a year’s state pension is not to be sneezed at, especially for the less well off. And once you reach 65 you can change back to being a male.
- Free drinks at night clubs
Some night clubs offer Ladies Nights with free drinks in order to encourage their custom (surely that’s discriminatory!). Blokes, why not change your gender and get free drinks?
- Prisoners – no need to be separated from the opposite sex
If you are convicted of a serious criminal offence and are going to spend some time in jail, why not change your sex for the duration? Males can change to females and spend their time in a women’s prison; females can change to male and spend their time in a men’s prison. Lots of fun to be had to help pass the tedious years in clink.
- Pay rises for female BBC presenters
All the grossly underpaid female presenters at the BBC can change their gender to male and demand an immediate pay rise.
If you can think of some more Top Tips to take advantage of the new Gender Recognition laws then email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will publish the best.
But remember, keep ‘em clean, make ‘em funny, and in the spirit of insanity the subject deserves.